After reading the recent NY Times interview with Mr. Cumberbatch and happening upon this choice quote, “Pull the hair on my head the wrong way, and I would be on my knees begging for mercy. I have very sensitive follicles.”, he decide to write a little ficlet in jest. I thought I would share it with you guys.

John begged Sherlock to stop, “Stop it Sherlock, you’re hurting me! This is my first time with a man remember!”
“You are to call me Mr. Homes!” Sherlock said while slapping John in the face. John liked it for some reason. Sherlock re-positioned himself, and John descended into a new plane of pleasure and pain. His arms flailed out wildly, he was unsure whether he was attempted to hit Sherlock or caress him. Suddenly, Sherlock let out an inhuman shriek and fell to the floor on his knees, begging for mercy.
“I have very sensitive follicles, John!” he pleaded. John was stunned for several moments and saw that he had gotten his hand caught in the mess of Sherlock’s hair. It had tightened into a hard fist. John then smiled and said calmly, “You are to call me Dr. Watson.

I died laughing; I’ve been unfortunate enough to read fanfictions that were supposed to be serious, which were this bad.  But I thought this was pretty funny.

housingworksbookstore:

newsweek:

urlesque:

scottfriday:

“Depending on the amount of time and participants, we define a project for every workshop.”

“Indeed, like in any endeavor, change and neural rewiring takes hard work over time.” : |

“There were differences between the groups.” Woo boy.

“Mrs. Winterson loved multi-purpose electrical goodies of hideous design.” I’m scared, Mrs. Winterson.

“Although Asher has a steady museum career, the real importance of his art lies in the way it has inspired a dynamic oral culture.”    Dynamic oral culture, I like the sound of that.

daftwithoneshoe:

The good people of Baker Street liked Christmas a lot,
But Sherlock, who lived in 221B, did NOT!
Sherlock hated Christmas! The whole Christmas season!
Now, please don’t ask why. No one quite knows the reason.
It could be that his head wasn’t screwed on just right.
It could be, perhaps, that his scarf was too tight.
But I think the most likely reason of all,
May have been that his caseload was two sizes too small.
Whenever the season arrived, without fail,
Sherlock would look at his empty inbox and let out a wail.
It seemed that the joy and goodwill that came with Christmas time,
Led people to cease to commit any manner of interesting crime.
He’d lay on his couch, he’d whine and he’d moan,
And wish with all his heart that Lestrade may decide to phone
And ask for his help with a case so puzzling
That normal people (idiots) would be left stuck and confuzzling.
He needed a case. Heck! Any would do!
He’d do anything for one, or even better, two!
“Christmas is coming,” he snarled with a sneer,
“This whole world has been struck with holiday cheer!
It’s disgusting! It’s rotten! It’s wretched! Repulsive!
What a terrible time to be a consulting detective!”
He grabbed John’s gun from it’s place in John’s drawer,
Shot at the wall and shouted “BORED! BORED! BORED! BORED!”

((For the rest click ‘read more’))

Read More

Best thing ever.

(Source: watchthis2011)

bowtiesandbadgers:

Rudy Wade has the best face.

I didn’t even know human faces could makes those shapes. Congratulations on your face, Rudy Wade.

(Source: gendrywaterss)

ahstheories:

*submitted by somekindofstrange

I’ve allowed myself to get lost in the huge conspiracy theory wank going on over at the American Horror Story tag and so far this is the only one that I can completely agree with. All of the Tate Twin theories and the “does he love Nora or Violet” debates will go on until we have concrete evidence, but this is a true fact right here. 

(Source: dekcol-rehs-ma-i)